Safety on Teen Social Networking Sites

By Jennifer Martinez

You've probably heard of MySpace or Friendster. And chances are, if you have kids, they have an account on at least one of these social networking sites. But if you're like most parents, you probably don't know exactly how your kids use them.

Social networking accounts are easy to open. They're generally free, and although most have age requirements, it's next to impossible to verify a user's age and identity. Many users are younger than the minimum age and some teens even claim to be older on their profiles.

As a parent, it's up to you to learn about these sites, engage your kids in dialogue and agree on some rules. For starters, most social networking sites offer the same basic features: a personal profile, a blog (a.k.a. an online journal), and interactive "friend" lists.

A profile is a web page where a child can post personal information, such as a name, a picture, and some favorite activities and interests. It may also include links to kids' blogs, pictures or videos. Many kids also use the blogs on these sites to post daily activities, thoughts and feelings. And so-called Friend lists often include people your children have met online or in person. People on a Friend list usually have access to "private" information, such as age, city or school, as well as having the ability to comment on your kids' blog. Some kids have an extensive network of online friends.

Risks Are Real
Social networking sites can raise behavioral and security concerns, including:

• Cyberbullying Kids are willing to say things online they wouldn't say face-to-face. Whether your children are on the sending or receiving end of such taunts, cyberbullying can entangle them in emotionally charged conflicts that can sometimes have a long-lasting and painful effect.
• Illegal behavior  Some kids make claims with more serious consequences. Not understanding the legal implications of their actions, teens have been known to libel teachers and other adults they may have animosity toward.
• Predators Sadly, adults can use these sites to seek out children and teen victims. Scanning personal profiles for favorite hangouts, addresses and school names, they can find the kind of information they need to stalk a child.

Socializing and Safety
So how can you keep your kids safe on social networking sites? As an extreme measure, you can disable your child's MySpace account. You can also search the web to find out what they post on their pages. However, doing this can make your kids feel that you've violated a trust, and it's much too easy for your kids to open another account without your knowledge. Communication, building trust and education are more effective alternatives.

Ask your kids to give you access to their profiles and blogs. Get their consent before you review the content from time to time, including their private areas. Finally, encourage your kids to follow these basic rules:

• Don't post information that could identify you or your physical location, including your last name, your school, where you live or where you spend time.
• Use the site's privacy features to limit access to your profile and only allow contact and comments from people you know and trust. Don't add people to your Friend list unless you know exactly who they are. Remove "friends" who post mean, untrue or compromising comments.
• Unless you can confirm exactly who they are, never agree to meet online friends in person. And even if you can confirm their identity, take precautions by meeting in a public, group setting.
• Don't post suggestive pictures or images that might give strangers clues about your identity or location. These pictures compromise your security and may also affect how relatives, employers and admissions counselors perceive you.
• Monitor your blog comments for compromising information your friends may have added. Delete anything you don't want people to see and consider removing offending posters from your trusted list.
• Don't lie about your age. Acting older than you are can put you in dangerous situations. If you don't meet the age requirement, look for sites like Live Journal, which offer lower age requirements and a safer environment.
• What you say on your site may become public, even if you post it in a private area. Don't use your account to spread rumors or disclose personal information about others. Your actions could have serious implications for you, your parents and the rest of your family.

Online socializing has given kids a new and exciting way to interact with the world, and to find community during a time in life that can often feel isolating. It has also redefined traditional notions of privacy and behavior. As a result, parents need to work with kids to keep them safe and to help them make healthy choices when it comes to social networking sites -- just like we do in the offline world.